All right, a brand new year begins! 2019 was so, well, last year! I am sure that this year will be the best one ever, just like last year, right? OK, maybe we won't answer that question.
One thing is for certain: 2020 will have its share of troubles. President Trump was given the gift of impeachment just before Christmas. I am sure he wants to return it but, sorry, no returns, no exchanges. Impeachment is forever, though, and a lasting part of the Trumpian legacy. Not to worry, he will remain in office, as the Senate has wink-winked its intentions to acquit the Golden One.
And lest we forget, 2020 is an election year. I'm sure you didn't, how could you amidst the constant bombardment of campaign ads, rallies and debates? The Democrats are gradually weeding out their field of candidates by attrition. While Republicans appear to be in lock-step behind the president, the Dems are throwing whatever they can on the wall to see what sticks. Bernie Sanders is back again, grumpier than ever. Joe Biden is making his case by asking us to remember the "good ol' days" of only 10 years ago. Elizabeth Warren's constant enthusiasm wears me out. Amy Klobuchar doesn't stand a chance because she is too much of a moderate pragmatist with Midwestern common sense. That won't fly at all in these times!
Bloomberg jumps into the race to save us all from super-sized sodas and rampant socialism. He will spend millions of his own money only to find that no one outside of New York cares. All voters see is another old white guy with another health care plan, giveaways, and no tax increase to pay for it all. His New York minute is about up.
I predict Biden will be the nominee, Sanders' followers will get mad (again) and stay home. Biden's vice-president nominee will be female, from the Midwest, and young just in case Joe's ticker gives out. But it will all be for naught because Trump will win a second term because too many late-night show hosts' careers depend on having him as a punching bag. The laughs and comedy will continue for another four years. Lucky us.
The big question will be the economy. Experts tell us we are way overdue for a "correction." Signs of a slowdown in manufacturing are a concern. Because Trump put forth such drastic tax cuts early on, it will be hard to go even lower on taxes to soften the blow of a slowing economy. If that wasn't bad enough, the federal debt is $5 trillion higher now than when Trump took office. Not much room left for bailouts if banks and housing go under again. Get ready for a "hard landing" when the market drops! Most likely, it won't occur until the day after the election. Lucky us.
But, hey, I don't want to be such a downer on the first day of the new year! Plenty of good things are coming in 2020, such as Top Gun: Maverick, the sequel to the 1986 movie of similar name. We get to see an aged Tom Cruise reliving his youthful days of naval carrier fly-bys. Since Hollywood resists taking chances on unique productions, we will also have sequels to Wonder Woman, Ghostbusters, and Bill & Ted. And, another James Bond movie which will feature Rami Malek, who brilliantly portrayed Freddie Mercury in Bohemian Rhapsody. Wow, great to have something to live for!
Keep in mind that we still haven't seen the end result of England's Brexit deal, Arkansas may actually win more than two football games this next season, and Japan will host the Summer Olympics. For sci-fi lovers with money to spare, Zombie Park will open next summer in Dubai. You can enjoy virtual reality cinema, ax throwing, battle games, paintball, a haunted house, and a zombie apocalypse all in one expensive location. Just remember you are in a country with strict moral laws and don't think too hard about the irony.
So, enjoy 2020, be safe, and don't take life too seriously.
Devin Houston is the president/CEO of Houston Enzymes. Send comments or questions to [email protected]. Opinions expressed are those of the author.
Editorial on 01/01/2020